Cabalistic Nights

You know that feeling when you just can't describe what it is exactly that makes you annoyed at someone? Yeah, that's exactly what I'm feeling right now. It just seems like everything they do pisses you off in one way or another.

Like always, it's always our fault and never yours. It's always us who are the ones not trying while you try so hard to keep it together. It's always our fault that you're lonely and our fault that we don't want to watch awkward moments. Yes, of course darling, it's always our fault. It's always us doing the wrong thing because you're always right, never to be corrected, even when the truth is staring at you in the face.

You know, sometimes the whole world isn't all about you. Surprisingly, there are other people around. You seem to be able to find an excuse for everything: I wasn't hungry, you guys left, I was trying, I was lonely, he was just keeping me company, we've been through this before, I can't change just like that, I need time, I was busy, I was tired, it wasn't my fault. I'm sick of hearing all these excuses.

You know I don't like watching, so let me go, please. Why get pissed at me for leaving when you're not going to spend time with me even if I stay? At least I can get something done during lunch instead of being bored and sitting there watching. Isn't it logic? Doesn't it make sense? I don't understand why you nag me to stay when it makes no difference for you whether or not I leave or not.

I just don't understand. Why are you doing this to me? Funny how I thought our friendship was unbreakable. Sure, people change. Perhaps it's my turn.